Like disco lemonade.

I don't know why I have a facebook. It continues to remind me of how stupid everyone is. I almost don't regret my lack of socializing. Seriously? Dogs lived outside back when so they should be fine being left outside by themselves now? Really? They're pack animals you idiots. Humans have always sought shelter? Like dogs didn't? All creatures seek shelter. This is why the shelters are full and breeds are banned. People are morons.



Oryx & Crake is really interesting right off the bat. If I wasn't busy listening to 90's music and looking up vegetarian recipes I'd be all over that.

I have been eating a lot of veggie burgers, and who knew a wrap made of only vegetables could be so boss? Not I. I've actually been feeling a lot less lethargic since. Going shopping at Fresh Market tomorrow. I'm not sure that I've cut out meat completely yet (see: chicken) but i'm working toward it. I'm still waiting to hear back on the prices of the gym from my aunt. I really want to start going again. It's too nice outside to be in the house all the time.

Dusk is even more gorgeous with a cool breeze attached to it. October, my long lost friend, hi.

I came into the office today to find that a guy I'd went to high school with (who also happens to be the son of a guy I work with) died over the weekend. I don't even want to type how he died because it sounds too horrific. It's no secret that I did not like the guy I went to high school with. Few of us did. He was abusive toward women and on one occasion hit me in the face with a beer bottle. He dated my friends and fathered the children of one of them. He was here in my office Friday but I avoided him. He sent me a friend request a few weeks ago but I left it in my inbox. I don't feel bad about any of that, maybe he changed after High School but he wasn't someone I was looking to have a friendship with. I wouldn't wish what happened to him on anyone though and I feel bad for his family. I hate thinking about death. It's so sudden. So strange. So urgent. I really want to go home and crawl back in bed with Matt.

I cannot seem to focus on reading today. Margaret Atwood is a good writer but Moral Disorder is pretty snooze worthy so far. I laid out on the back porch for a bit today to tan. It's nice to get some sunshine every now and then. I also wrote out a plan for October that I'd like to stick to. I'm so overwhelmed with things to do and things money is needed for that I figure if I can just pick a few things each month to tackle that one day i'll get where i'm trying to go. For October I think we are going to join a gym, start eating healthier (frequent goal quickly forgotten whenever pizza is thought of), try to go to Zombicon and look into getting a new bed & bedding because they're pretty needed. Then maybe next month... eye appointment and car repairs? And Matt's birthday of course. He wants to get a TV on black friday. Oh and a turkey and a Christmas tree! Then after that it's already December and Christmas! Geez. I need to have money set aside for school in case I'm able to sign up in January so everyone will probably get baked goods made by me. It's the thought that counts, right? Man I can't wait for it to get colder and to put up a Christmas tree in my own place :)

2011? School, start a car fund (because let's face it), move into a house maybe. I cannot believe 2010 went by so quickly.

sigh.

That isn't even the same blanket, just the same idea. The one at Anthro is even more expensive.

I was lost in the lakes
And the shape that your body makes
That your body makes

And the mountains said I could find you here
They whisper the snow and the leaves in my ear
I traced my finger along your trails
Your body was the map
I was lost in there

Floating over your rocky spine
The glaciers made you and now you're mine

I was moving across your frozen veneer
The sky was dark
But you were clear
Could you feel my footsteps?
And would you shatter, would you shatter?
Would you?

Your soft fingers between my claws
Like purity against resolve
I could tell then there that we were formed from the clay
And came from the rocks for earth to display

They told me to be careful up there
Where the wind rages through your hair

Ah, my day has consisted of Gemma Doyle, Daria, photo taking in the backyard with the dog, the usual relationship playful antics, the office, garden pizza, hair dye, nail polish, tumblr photos of houses i'd like to live in, monster x's 2, music music music, buying collage making materials, pumpkin scented candles, and Margaret Atwood. Who's complaining?

I really want to live in a house. Particularly the house above. I want dogs (plural!) and a backyard with a doggy door and natural light and space space space. All my own. And well this guy and the dogs of course. But still Home. Home with character and nothing to be heard but the breeze.

Anagrams.

"She looked pink and beseeching, though essentially she looked the same, as people do despite the fact they have begun to turn into monsters and are about to tell you something that should require horns or fangs or vaulted eyebrows but never apparently does."

"Love, I realized, was something your spine memorized. There was nothing you could do about that."