10 things i wish to say to 10 different people, no names: * Sometimes I worry that he doesn't feel like you feel but I truly have no clue. I understand you and think you deserve much goodness and an understanding hand, where neither is there just to keep from loneliness.
* Do you still consider me a great friend, or merely a misguided acquaintance? Different paths we walk, but I still hope you see the zest for a meaningful life in my actions, even if they're not as apparent as they used to be when my heart remained broken and raw.
* I still hope it gives you hell. You don't deserve what you have.
* Please don't hurt yourself. I am always here.
* I can't put our lost friendship into words, but I know that despite its importance it isn't right and probably never was. But it was always important.
* I was put here in this world for you, not for anyone prior to, you hold my hand when I can't move, you don't ask me to be what I can't which is whole, and we will never lose the meaning in this.
* Sometimes I wonder if my rejection genuinely hurt you, or if I was just a fleeting crush, I hope it was the latter.
* I wish you'd chosen someone better. I still hope one day you will.
* I'm thankful for all that you've done for me. I wish you would instead focus on yourself and finding what you deserve instead of trying to help all of us.
9 things about myself:
* I often start things but do not finish. There are too many things that I want to do.
* I am obsessive compulsive when it comes to many things.
* I am not as open as I used to be.
* I always carry a book with me.
* I just started to like coffee.
* I can't go into a kitchen without accidentally burning myself somehow.
* I just realized that I don't think I ever want to have children. I am too selfish and sort of unwilling not to be and you should always be selfless for your kids.
* I can't fill a paper journal without getting distracted or worrying that it will be read, though I'm always writing.
* I like LOST. A lot. That show is like a friend.
8 ways to win my heart:
* Have a story.
* "Get" me.
* Be protective.
* Like the same nerdy things I like.
* Be passionate in everything that you do.
* Be intelligent.
* Be spontaneous.
* Be willing to talk, scream and cry.
7 things that cross my mind a lot:
* The future.
* The past.
* Love.
* LOST.
* Things to do, lists to make.
* Impulsive random decisions to be made immediately.
* Why.
6 things i do before i fall asleep:
* Create elaborate stories in my head and live in them as they unfold.
* Think of the things I meant to do but didn't and vow to do them tomorrow. Repeat.
* Wash my feet.
* Fidget.
* Put chap stick on my lips.
* Harass Matt.
5 of your favorite movies:
* Drop Dead Fred.
* A variety of Disney classics.
* Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.
* Breakfast At Tiffany's.
* Avatar.
4 things in my purse/backpack:
* My keys.
* A purple pen Holly gave me for Christmas.
* Vitamin C.
* The endless abyss.
3 songs i listen to most often (lately):
* Bon Iver - Skinny Love
* The Killers - All These Things That I've Done
* Glee Cast - Gives You Hell
2 things I want to do before I die:
* See the world.
* Love selflessly.
1 confession:
* I don't know what I'm doing.
